19.4.03

were you there? No? I didn't think so. I don't care if you talk about it as long as you don't try to pretend you were there, because you weren't.
goddam knot.
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
but stay awhile and baby then you'll see
a different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
but soon enough you're going to think of me
and how I used to be


Old e-mails open the floodgates of nostalgia, and all the half-dead memories come rushing back into living, breathing existence. Hard to imagine that I really felt this way all the time only a year ago. I remember - my feelings remember - and I wonder, how the hell did I get myself into all of that? ... so attached, so involved, and at the same time so alone. At least now I'm at a point where I know I can walk away from it. Just walk away. Heh...perspective is a wonderful thing.
Funny how I'm so willing to accept the facades that my friends put on, when I know, have known, that much more lies beneath, and that my cheerful, funny comrades are in fact more than "a little unwell." I tend to think of my younger self as a more innocent, more oblivious girl. Looking at these emails reminds me just how grown-up I've had to be. I've been that way for many years, it seems, and there's just more ahead. What happened to the carefree childhood days?
We're on the verge of life - standing on the edge of the cliff with hangliders, waiting for the perfect breeze to carry us away, one by one. Sucks that the preparation had to be the confusing, troubling teenage years.
On a lighter note, I should have sent some of my homemade cookies home with the Scrub and the Barrelmaker. They're just sitting here, and I keep eating them. Time to go to the gym, or perhaps help with some housework.
Homework? What homework?

Today's lyrics brought to you courtesty of Matchbox Twenty.

18.4.03

have I proved yet just how much I need to get a life?
No? Okay.

your ideal mate is Legolas!
Legolas


Who is your Ideal Lord of the Rings (male) Mate?
brought to you by Quizilla

*dusting off hands* That should do it.
almost forgot... Friday Five!
1. Who is your favorite celebrity?
Not into celebs all that much, but I guess Harrison Ford would be right up there at the top of the list. He's just so... cute. I think something needs to be done about the colossal age difference between us, but other than that... yeah.
2. Who is your least favorite?
Again... I don't think I do enough research to have a least favorite. If I did, it would probably be somebody who did something despicable... somebody like R. Kelly.
3. Have you ever met or seen any celebrities in real life?
Nope. Sad life, eh?
4. Would you want to be famous? Why or why not?
I could stand for 'mildly famous', that is, to be quoted or cited for my research or something. Being insanely famous would mean a lack of privacy and loss of normal life.
5. If you had to trade places with a celebrity for a day, who would you choose and why?
Dave Barry. Writing humor columns? Hell yeah. Or maybe Eddie Izzard, if he were on tour, because I'd love to have that kind of talent. Okay, so I'm a big fan of comedy.
Came across a random site today that was rather odd, but one of the stories did include luncheon meat truncheons.
.....
Yeah, that was my reaction, too. You can check it out at your own risk, although I regret including a link to a site with such revolting sexual innuendos.
So bored today. Went to the gym already. I suppose I could clean house, but I've been supposing that for a few hours now. Am wondering how my truck would look if I washed and waxed it. Actually doing that would be another thing altogether.
Hell, I might as well go and do one of the two aforementioned activities, because otherwise I will just sit here, surf the web, and eat. No good.

out across the endless sea
I would die in ecstacy
but I'll be a bag of bones
driving down the road alone
my heart is drenched in white
you'll be on my mind forever
Something has to make you run
don't know why I didn't come
feel as empty as a drum
don't know why i didn't come


Norah Jones, Don't Know Why

17.4.03

I'm back!
Got back yesterday. we had a fantastic time... managed to stay out of trouble. Narrowly. Anyway, so my brother is out on a date, except I think he missed the showtime. I'll check once Dad gets off the phone... yep. Turns out Brother #1 got lost on the way to his date's house, and they're gonna have to catch an ever later showtime of Anger Management. That kid should not be allowed to drive.
Speaking of Anger Management, Mini-Sheik wants me to watch it with him when he gets back from his road trip. And Manzanita, who is currently in Southern California, might go see it with Jihad. How's that for irony?
I miss Manzanita and Batman. They need to come home right now, dammit.
So, fun game to be played tonight. Something about running around and trying to get downtown without people in cars finding you. Sounds like Grand Theft Auto 3 without the guns and killing. Also, if all goes well, no police. And no stealing cars.
Okay, bad analogy.

The quote that I wanted to include in Monday's post was from Cheers... couldn't find it anywhere on the 'net. So... I'll pretend I have it. It was from Cliff, and he was talking about Big Boy's, and how he's so vulnerable because everyone knows what he looks like. Denny's knows what they're doing, because no one has ever seen Denny. Then he ends it by saying, "Did I just say that out loud?"
...It would probably be funnier if I had the quote.
Gotta go work on convincing Dad that running around at midnight will be safe. And that I'll be home at a reasonable hour. Like that'll work.

currently addicted to dispatch's the general

14.4.03

I'm going on a roadtrip!!! yay! Should be good fun - I've never been out of state with just my friends before.
Funny what you dream up to do when your closest friends are out of town.
Sucks that I started Spring Break off with a nasty cold. Hope it goes away soon, but I don't think swimming in the ocean will alleviate my illness.
Well, i have errands to run before I have to leave, so I'll catch ya all later (a few days from now). have a good spring break, my friends!

[quote I was searching for today was not available - check back in a week]